The Tony Kornheiser lesson: Even when you think someone is not, someone is ALWAYS listening
Of course, by now, you have probably heard of the statements that Tony Kornheiser made about ESPN Analyst, Hannah Storm. In case you missed it, here it is what he said:
“Hannah Storm in a horrifying, horrifying outfit today,” Kornheiser said. “She’s got on red go-go boots and a catholic school plaid skirt … way too short for somebody in her 40s or maybe early 50s by now.
“She’s got on her typically very, very tight shirt. She looks like she has sausage casing wrapping around her upper body … I know she’s very good, and I’m not supposed to be critical of ESPN people, so I won’t … but Hannah Storm … come on now! Stop! What are you doing?”
Now, the fact that he made these statements are bad enough. I don’t think anybody would question that point. However, it’s further magnified by the fact that he made the comments on his radio show.
Do we feel sorry for him? OOOOO, no! 2 weeks off the air is just a drop in the bucket. He’s already apologized and he will be back on prime time before march madness is officially over. The reason I’m bringing this story forward is for the millions of people who ‘like’ Tony think they can say something and nobody is paying attention.
Unfortunately, most people don’t realize that every one on the internet has the potential to reach MILLIONS of people in an instant. And for those of you who are working, you need to realize one fundamental fact. If you use the internet as your sounding board, at least ONE of those millions of people may know your BOSS!!!!
Let’s be real. We LOVE our technology. We’re intoxicated by twitter. Fascinated by Facebook. Mesmerized by Myspace. Blown away by our Blogs. And yelling ‘hip hip, hoo ray’ for YOU TUBE! And you better believe that we use every tool that we can think of when can.
Unfortunately, in our ‘haste’ to fully maximize all of these tools, we let two little words called ‘common sense’ seep out of our ears. What made you think that posting an update on your facebook page that says “my boss is an idiot’ wouldn’t get back to her? Who told you that a ‘tweet’ that says “my boss is stupid” wouldn’t get back to him?
And I got news for you. It’s almost like getting caught in bed with someone who is NOT your significant other. You can do the Texas Two step as much as you want but when the music stops, yo ass is GONE!! You can’t argue a post that YOU wrote. You can’t argue what you put in YOUR facebook page. There is no getting around it. And, as one of my tech friends once told me, once it’s on the web, it’s A WRAP! You can’t get it off. You can’t modify it. You may be able to TRY and delete it but if the wrong person saw it and copied it, I got two words for you:
“TOO LATE”
“PINK SLIP”
“YOU’RE FIRED”
Hell, take your pick!!
And OH, don’t think because you wrote a posting AFTER hours at home that you’re safe. As more and more companies move to regular use of technology, you NEVER know who may watching. Now, I’m not saying that you should censor your speech. However, you need to understand two points. ONE, if you say something disparaging about your employer, be prepared to accept the consequences. TWO, you don’t TRULY know who has your back in an employment situation so don’t let yourself fall into a false sense of security. In the right situation, people WILL DIME YOU OUT!!
Listen, we aren’t all of the same calibur as Hannah Storm or Tony Kornheiser or Shawn Johnson or Apollo Ohno. Millions of people are not resting on our every word. But be careful. There are a FEW people who are very interested in what you have to say and you don’t want WHAT you say to effect WHERE you work.
Whether it’s Conan O’Brien or Jay Leno, you’re still an employee! Don’t take it personally!
If you are one of those million people who have been engrossed in this whole process of watching all of this drama unfold before your very eyes, you are probably saying to yourself, “Give me a break”.
You’re probably not moved by the fact that Conan O’Brien will be getting $45 million dollars to leave his job and Jay will get his old job back. It’s easy to look at their situation and think to yourself “Man, they got money coming out of their ears so why should THEY be pressed!”. This situation sounds ALOT like what we regularly see in professional sports. Big time athletes being bought of their contracts. We get so caught up in the glow of the money being thrown around that we still ignore one FUNDAMENTAL point.
THEY are STILL employees!!!
Wrap your brain around this fact. Conan sat and waited for the opportunity to move into this position. How many of you have found yourselves in this position where you are sitting and waiting patiently for your opportunity. You’ve been the model employee. You’ve worked hard. You’ve kept your nose clean. You’ve done everything you’ve been asked to do. Then, at the last second, something happens. A business decision. Nothing that relates to you but it is a decision. Now, all of sudden, you’re no longer the person being looked at for the job. Even worse, someone else is hired for that exact same position right before your very eyes. At best, you can wait patiently for your next opportunity. At worst, you would have wasted your time with the hopes and aspiration that that door may open again.
It’s easy to look at a pro athlete or a tv personality or even a corporate mogul and say, ‘they aren’t hurting. they getting paid’. However, money doesn’t always LESSEN the sting. Sometimes, the situation itself is a blow to your ego. It’s a blow to your emotions. It’s a blow to your reputation. Think about it. If you were waiting all these years for your chance and it passes you by, you would wonder (and others MIGHT wonder) if the problem wasn’t a business decision but maybe a lack of faith in your ability to rise to the occasion.
Taking money OUT of the equation, the simple fact is that we all tend to get emotional invested in our employment. Our jobs and our ability to do our jobs tends to be direct reflection on us. We don’t play around when it comes to that reflection. We know our job today will impact our jobs for tomorrow. We know that people look at us based on our skill, our position, and our status. Those things are personal and NO amount of money can remove that from us.
The hardest thing that alot of us will face is someone telling us that “business is business”. When you’re an employee, it’s a reality that you know but it’s also a reality that is hard to sometimes accept. When you’re an employee, you understand that a considerable amount of your livelihood is dictated by the impression and perceptions of others. So you do everything you can to make that a reality. Unfortunately, in the grand scheme of things, all too many times, employees find themselves in the tough position of taking a decision that is made above them personally.
No one is saying that you should be a robot and that you should disconnect your feelings from your job. It’s not an easy task to do. However, it is important to remember that at the end of the day, even though employers typically will look out for your well being, the viability of your employment is based on the bottom line. It’s not sexy but it is, what it is.
It’s important that you do everything YOU do to ensure that YOU strive to and continue to maintain the best image and reputation for yourself.
What happens after I file a discrimination claim? What happens if I want to sue the employer for discrimination?
Let me provide you some information regarding your employment case which Ihope will give you some greater insight into the discrimination administrative and litigation process.
In most instances, your claim starts with a filing with the Federal Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Some states have a state equivalent to the EEOC. In addition, in those states, filing with the EEOC constitutes filing with the state counterpart.
Now, under the federal regulations, the EEOC has 180 days to investigate your claim from the date of your filing before you are entitled to ask for a “Right to Sue” letter. Which means, in the 180 days, the law requires that the administrative agency must be given the opportunity to independently investigate the allegations regarding your case. Now, the EEOC is not bound take make any determination in 180 days. This time period is provided in order to permit the agency the appropriate amount of time to investigate.
After 180 days, the charging party (i.e. you) can ask for a “Right to Sue” letter. You have to be careful about asking for the letter before the 180 days because you risk the possibility of the case being thrown out in court due to not allowing the administrative agency the opportunity to properly investigate (thus the phrase “exhausting your administrative remedies”).
Now, under the state regulations, you may be under the same criteria but it’s important that you investigate to determine they have the same time lines. It’s important because you want to ensure that you protect your state rights as well as your federal rights.
In most, the magic number is 180 days. You gotta let the agency do their investigation in order to exhaust the administrative remedies.
Now, what usually happens is that one of the agencies will take the lead and do the investigation. What happens is that they will contact you and the employer and see if you want to mediate. If the employer thinks they did nothing wrong, they may not mediate (even if they do agree to mediate, they may not think they did anything wrong but may be considering settling just to get rid of the case). So in this case, the case goes back to the investigator. What usually happens is the investigator will ask for a position statement from
the employer (which usually means their rebuttal to what you said). Then,the investigator will start his or her investigation regarding your case.
Usually, there is no time line to respond. And usually after the employer responds, that is the point when the investigation begins. During this time period, you will usually wait for additional information from the investigator as well as provide any updated information you may obtain.
Keep in mind that the investigation process is not bound by any time line. They can take as long as they need to take in order to come to a resolution. In addition, since we are in a down economy, a lot of their investigators are severely backlogged so it may take a while to move on your case accordingly.
Once it gets close to the 180 day mark, it may be time to decide if it’s better to allow the EEOC to continue their
investigation, ask for a right to sue letter for federal court, or just file a law suit in state court
Right now, the worst part of the process but the most important part of the process. You’re in the 180 day administrative period
where you literally have to sit and wait.
Ultimately, whenever you’re filing a charge against an employer, three things can happen. One, they can settle in the early phases of the
administrative investigation (which your employer declined to do). Two, the investigating agency may determine that they violated the law or didn’tviolate the law or they can’t tell. Finally, you can sue your employer.
The bottom line is that you are seeking compensation for damages you incurred by your job loss as a result of their actions. The reality is that in this economy, some employers will not compensate you until they are sued and, even then, they may MAKE you take them to trial in order for them to pay. Every case is different and the starting number in an employment case is zero since most employers will argue that they owe you nothing to start.
If you have to go to court, that’s a whole new process. With any court case, you have to sue the other party. They respond. You provide a request for discovery and they provide one back to us. Ypi have to depose witnesses and you will have to be deposed. They will
file motions. You will file motions. This whole process take another year before you even put a jury together to fight it out in court. So even if you get the right to sue letter, you might not go to trial until some time in the next year.
I know that sounds wild but follow this timeline. If you file a law suit in February 25, 2010, you have to serve it to them. That’s a couple of days. They may have 20 days to respond. You will file a request for documents and information. That’s another 30 days. So that puts you into April 2010. They will ask for documents from you and from you. They will give you 30 days. That takes you into May 2010. Youu will depose people from their job and they will depose you. That will probably happen in June or July 2010 (if you’re lucky). If you
have everything you, you may try to set the case for trial. Courts typically set the trial for 3 to 6 months out (Depending) so that will easily take you into 2011. Now, this is purely hypothetical but I wanted you to get an idea of how long this thing will
last so you can brace yourself and your family for the time you have to wait.
Remember, the employer doesn’t think they did anything wrong so they are under NO obligation to give you anything until they decide they want to or a jury / judge orders them to give you something. The process I describe is merely designed to give you an indication of what you will be facing if you have to go the distance.
I know it’s hard but it’s important to understand that it’s a process that you must go through and it takes time, money, and energy. Be patient.
Why employee manuals are so important
How many of you remember getting hired and being given some 10 to 100 page manual that you are suppose to read and then sign indicating that you understand what you read????
A lot of you should have raised your hands. I can confidently say that one of the single most boring activities has to be the reading employee manuals. Most of us when we start our jobs are so happy to be working that we barely even skim the pages and go RIGHT to the page where it says sign. In some cases, we don’t even know where the employee manual is after we signed it.
Unfortunately, in too many instances, when something crazy jumps off at our work place, the best tool for identifying your rights is that employee manual.
Now, that may do nothing for you if you are in a tough situation but here are a few things you should think about:
1) When you get hired
Read! Read! Read! I know it’s boring and I know you feel it’s a waste of your time but TAKE the opportunity to read the employee manual. This way, you are up to speed on what you are entitled and your job rights.
2) What should you be looking for?
You definitely want to focus on any grievance procedure and disciplinary protocol. You want to know what you need to do if you are contesting your discipline or what the grounds are for disciplining you.
3) What if they don’t have one?
Some employers may not have an employee handbook or policy manual. In some states, they may not be required to have one so don’t be surprised if they don’t.
4) While you’re working
Ask your employer if they have periodically updated the employee manual. If they don’t have one, ask if they intend produce one. More importantly, if you receive updates from your employer regarding Human Resource policies and procedures, READ! READ! READ!
5) When something goes bad
Here’s where most people are interested. And this situation can sometimes be delicate. If you are unsure about your rights, don’t be afraid to ask to review the employee manual. If you are still tentative about going to your supervisor, go speak to Human Resources and ask for a copy (Or at least a review).
The employee manual (if your employer has one) is a valuable tool that can be your best friend and ally in situations involving your employment. Don’t be school to check to see if your rights are violated. If you don’t, no one else will.
What should you do if you think you’re going to get fired?
In this day and age, people are become more and more concerned about their job security. Even when the market was good, the last thing you want to see happen or have happen is to find yourself in a situation where you think you are about to get fired. Now, there is a difference between getting fired or laid off. When you get laid off, it’s usually due to some type of financial decision that was made by the employer in an effort to reorganize or save cost (Unless you think they are just saying that to get rid of you and that’s a whole different topic).
Usually, when you think that you are about to get fired, this situation usually occurs as a result of some type of ongoing tension between you and your employer. This tension can not only be distracting but also upsetting. The last thing you want to do is find yourself in a situation where you think that someone is going to drop the hammer on you.
Unfortunately, when people find themselves in this situation, their first instinct is to try and figure out a way to keep this from happening. Doing this can be tricky because you literally don’t know what the employer is thinking so it’s kind of hard to take any proactive step to stop this from happening.
But don’t think you’re completely helpless. You can do a few things to keep YOU on your game so that you don’t make your situation worse:
1) Is your employment unionized?
In most instances, if you are in a ‘union shop’ (i.e. you are a member of a union), the union representative is your best resource. If you think the hammer is about to drop, I would be quick to tell you to go and speak with you union representative. The reason I mention this is because invariably if there is a grievance procedure to go through, you will have to go through that first if there is any type of collective bargaining agreement in place.
2) Be careful of WHAT disciplinary actions may come your way.
You have to be mindful of any additional disciplinary actions. If you find yourself getting written up for things, make sure you take the opportunity to read what the allegations are. Most employers give you the option to ’sign or not sign’ and in some instances, you may have the ability to write a rebuttal. In any event, you want to be careful about any ‘additional disciplinary actions’ that appear to pop up from no where (especially if you’ve never had any problems in the past).
3) Keep an eye out on the BEFORE and AFTER!
What is your employment track record? If you’re an employee who has never been written up and gets great evaluations, you are probably going to be a bit concerned when you start noticing an increase in negative evaluations. Pay attention to how soon these ‘negative evaluations’ occur and more importantly, pay attention to the timing of these evaluations.
4) What type of state are you in?
Meaning are you an AT WILL state which means the employer can fire you for any reason or no reason (as long as it doesn’t violate any clearly defined law i.e. based on race, gender, age, etc.).
5) If this place is not a union shop (i.e. has a union) and you are what is called “RIGHT TO WORK” state, you need to be careful.
If you find yourself getting ‘verbal communications’ about things that you should do in an effort to improve your situation, you should a nice letter to the employer summarizing the content of these meetings and your understanding of what they want you to do and WHY they want you to do it. You should emphasize the facts (not the emotions) such as NO indication of corrective action (if that’s what happened). Be careful because when you start documenting, the employer will think you’re up to something but THIS POINT forward, you needs to be documenting everything.
6) Be SMART.
It’s amazing how GANGSTA people get when they think that someone is about to bring the heat! It’s even further magnified when they believe that they have had a reputation and livelihood effected. Be careful about being a pistol. The law is fairly clear that if the employer has a ‘personality conflict’ with an employee, this is different from discrimination. An employer may be able to put the heat on you for not getting along. You don’t want to do anything to trip over your own feet. I’m not saying you can’t be vocal about anything that may be illegal but you have to be careful not to come off as the unruly employee who is not trying to work with management to improve.
7) If they are going to let you go, there may be nothing you can do
Absent some express contractual provision or a provision in a union collective bargaining agreement, you may not be able to STOP an employer from you. You can possibly sue to get your job back. You can sue for damages. However, if they decide to let you go, that’s’ it.
IF you get fired, file (if you thinks you’ve been discriminated) right away.
The moment that the adverse employment action, you will have 180 days to file with the EEOC (I don’t know what the time line is for most states for a similar state action) but you don’t want to wait.
9) Don’t expect your co-workers to automatically have your back.
In an employment setting, when it’s a choice between your job and your friend, your Worker FRIEND will probably choose their job. Even though employers are not permitted to retaliate against an employee for participating in a situation like this, employees may still run scared because they don’t want their employer looking at them crazy.
10) GO TO A LAWYER!!!
Sometimes, lawyers can do certain things that may put the employer on notice that they better chill out if they are doing something potentially illegal. However, it’s important that you take the opportunity to speak with an attorney so you can understand and appreciate all of your options.
Let me be the first to tell you that there is nothing sexy about being in a position where you are worried about the financial well being of your job. With all of the stresses that you deal with in your day to day life, the last thing you want to have in front of you is a situation where you are freaking out about the possibility of losing your job. Be smart. Most importantly, if the climate of your job has changed, you may want to think about changing the weather. I know it gets kind of crazy when you’ve been in a job for a number of years but in the end, your sanity is much more important than a paycheck.
How does getting a lump sum of money affect my Social Security Benefits?
This topic can be really scary. You know the deal. You’ve busted your butt for weeks and months and maybe YEARs to get your disability benefits. Now, all of sudden, you find yourself in a position where you get a lump sum of money and you don’t know what to do.
The lump sum could be anything. It could be an inheritance. It could be a settlement. It could be a gift. How do you determine if you should tell Social Security about the money and what should you do?
Here’s a few things to consider:
1) Remember, Social Security is the federal government and the FEDERAL GOVERNMENT ALWAYS FINDS OUT!!
WHY?! WHY!? WHY are you going to try and run dirty with the federal government, man?? People don’t realize how many things are connected to their social security number. So if you get a ‘windfall’ (like the lottery, or a settlement, or inheritance), there is a PRETTY good likelihood that this information will be reported to the federal government. The information may be reported for tax purposes but if you’re on disability, you better believe that it’s going to filter down to the appropriate agencies.
2) Understand what Social Security disability program you are on.
Most people don’t realize that Social Security has several Disability programs. These different programs require you to be found disabled. However, each program has different requirements when it relates to money and income.
3) There’s a difference between REDUCTION, SUSPENSION and TERMINATION
Depending on the program, your benefits could be reduced because of the amount of money that you receive or the TYPE of money that you receive. Also, for some disability programs, your benefits could be suspended if you receive a lump sum of money. However, this suspension typically remains in effect until you spend all of the money down to a particular dollar amount. Once you have spent the money, you should notify the Social Security Administration so they can reinstate your benefits. Now, keep in mind this point. If your benefits are suspended for more than a year, Social Security will terminate your benefits. In other words, you will have to start over from scratch.
4) Call the Social Security Administration, don’t try to figure it out.
So many times people will receive a lump sum or they know a lump sum is coming so they freak out and are afraid to call Social Security. Under most of the disability plans, you probably won’t have a problem. However, it is much easier to alert Social Security BEFORE than after THEY find out.
5) If you get Workers Compensation or Veterans Benefits, make SURE you understand how they affect your benefits.
Let’s say that while your Social Security disability benefits was coming, you finally SETTLE a big Workers Compensation claim that you had going for a while. MAKE sure you have someone explain to you how your workers compensation benefits may cause an offset or reduction of your benefits. The same is true for Veterans Benefits. Some of the Veterans Benefits programs can count against your Social Security.
5) If you owe SSA money, they will get their money back.
If you get a lump sum of money and, if you know you are, CONTACT Social Security. Don’t wait around. If Social Security determines that you received money from them that you SHOULDN’T have received, they will take it out of your disability check and that is NOT a pretty picture.
6) Be careful if you’re on SSI
The program that is most effected by by WINDFALLS is “SUPPLEMENTAL SECURITY INCOME or SSI”. SSI is the program that is NEED BASED. It’s like a welfare program. So if you are getting SSI and then you get a lump sum of money, your benefits may be affected. Your benefits could be reduced or suspended.
7) If you get a lump sum, keep a check on your documents
Keep a record of the items you are spending your lump sum. This way if Social Security makes a big fuss about where the money went, you can show them.
Getting disability benefits is a long and tough process. Keeping those benefits may be tougher if you find yourself in a position to receive a lump sum. However, if you’re smart and pay close attention to detail, you should be able to navigate through the process with little issue.
To quit or NOT to quit: Be mindful of HOW you leave your job
One of the most significant points in a person’s life is the point at which they must end their service of employment. Unfortunately, the WAY the employment ends may either be amicable or hostile, mutual or unilateral, or voluntary or involuntary.
Sometimes, the way we leave can be even trickier when you factor in unemployment compensation, severance pay, recommendations, and references. So you can easily see how difficult it may be from a technical standpoint with regards to leaving your job.
Alot of times, when we find ourselves in a position of realizing that our employment with an employer may be coming to an end, a whole lot of things come into play. You ask yourself “Do I wait until I’m fired or do I quit?”, “Should I start looking for another job or should I ride out with this one?”, or “Should I ask if my job is safe or should I just do my own thing?”.
With so many situations and scenarios in front of us, we ask ourselves “What should I do?”:
1) START LOOKING NOW. As tough as it may seems, the reality is that companies are downsizing and cutting costs. As a result, the cost may include reducing the number of employees. Most of us don’t move with a sense of urgency unless we have to and let me tell you, if you are losing your job, THAT is a sense of urgency.
2) ASK ABOUT YOUR JOB AND YOUR FUTURE. Listen, a company may say that your jobs aren’t in jeopardy but if enough information is floating out there to let people know that things may be getting tight, you can’t sit by comfortably and trust that your company is going to keep rolling. Ask what the future may hold. More importantly, ask for a good letter of recommendation in the event you decide to start looking.
3) DON’T DO ANYTHING STUPID. When your job get tense, people get angry. Don’t sit there and think that just because your boss made you mad you can just leave your job for a day to cool off. Leaving your job may be considered ‘JOB’ abandonment. As such, in some states, you may not be able to collect Unemployment.
4) DO I RESIGN or SHOULD I BE TERMINATED? Now, here’s the million dollar question, “Do I resign or should I be terminated?”. Here’s how it flows, if you resign, you leave on your terms. You have the ability to end your employment and from this point on, if anyone questions your end of your services, you can say that YOU ended your employment. However, if you voluntary end your services, in most cases, you can’t apply for unemployment compensation. Now, if you decide to let the company terminate you, you can now draw unemployment. This way, you can ensure that you have some income coming into the house while you look for a new job. However, when you apply for a new job, you still have to inform future employers that you were terminated from service.
The one thing this economy has done was put our society in the unique situation of evaluating our next career move. The time for being at a company for 20 years is probably rapidly leaving our society. As such, we have to be more aggressive about the moves that we make to ensure our health and prosperity.
It’s hard to separate your JOB from your LIFE
One attorney once told me that “employment law is the most PERSONAL law you will ever deal with!”. Interestingly so, he was right.
When you go to work, you are not merely ‘punching a clock’ as you would like to believe. Your job and your ability to do your job has a profound impact on you personally, professionally, emotionally, and psychologically:
1) Personally! Face facts. Your job is responsible for a great many things that are related to your life. Your job pays your bills. Your job puts clothes on your kids backs and puts your kids through college. You can’t drive a car without gas and you can’t have gas without money. It is a necessary part of your existence.
2) Professionally! One attorney once told me “You spend a lifetime developing your reputation and you can lose it in 60 seconds or less!”. We all take our jobs personally but we take greater pride if the reputation we establish for ourselves. If we are good at what we do, we take pride in the world knowing it.
3) Emotionally! Anything that happens to your job, happens to you and your family. If your company is going bankrupt, you are not put in the position of wondering what the future may hold for you. You will be stressed. You will be anxious. You will be scared.
4) Psychologically! If something happens to you AT your job, you can’t merely walk away from that feeling. Think about it, you spend 40 hours a week in front of the same people. So if your boss rights you up or a co-worker cusses you out, you can’t just write them off. You have to see those people tomorrow. More importantly, those feelings will linger as long as you are there.
So you can imagine the power and concern when you find yourself in a position where you have been terminated or let go. This single event is the most devastating event in most people’s lives. No one wants to go through the situation of being ‘let go’. The simple fact of the matter is that we are all control freaks to a degree and NO ONE wants to leave a siuation on terms other than their own.
So you can imagine how all of the things that I mentioned above could come into play. You now have to figure out how you are going to pay your bills. You now have to figure out how you are going to find a new job. If you are terminated, you wonder if it is because of you or something that you have done. Now, you wonder how other employers will view you being terminated.
A million different emotions go running through your head. What’s even worse is that when you have to leave, it may not be a sexy leave because there are some predisposed thoughts that you may have floating through your mind:
1) Computer. Let me tell you something. If it’s personal, don’t put it on your computer. The simple fact of the matter is that your computer is your COMPANY’s computer. So you don’t want to have this misguided thought that you are entitled to get your information off of your computer. Because in reality, the computer is NOT yours!
2) Employee File. Check the laws in your states but some people have a sense of ‘ownership’ when the employer maintains an employee file. As an employee, you think “Hey, it’s my information about me! Why can’t I have it? It’s MY employee file!”. Back up a second. Depending on the state, these ‘employee files’ are merely kept as a means to maintaining records about you and your activities with the employer. In essence, the employee file is the property of the EMPLOYER! Think about it like this, if employers knew that they had to give their employees the employee files, they may not maintain them. Why? If you ask for your employee file, what are you REALLY looking for in the file?? That’s right! Something that you can use against the employer, if possible. Don’t suck your teeth. You know what I’m talking about!
3) Employee Friends v. Friends Friends. I know that sounds crazy but so many times, when we leave our jobs in a ‘blaze of glory’, we think that those same people who we used to ‘vent’ to about our jobs will be our biggest allies if we need them. Hey, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but we are in a tough economy so you just can’t predict what an employee will do. And you can’t hold it against them. Friends are friends but business is business. They have the same families to feed like you so they may have to make the tough decision to not put themselves out there.
Understand this, my friends, jobs are tough and our connections to our jobs are even tougher. In this tough economy, alot of us are finding ourselves in the position of having to determine what we need to do in order to survive. I know it’s hard to separate one from another but you must in order to move forward.
Life (and the bills) don’t stop just because you can’t work
One of the hardest things to tell my clients is to “hold on”. It’s really hard. It’s tough because most people are forced to have to evaluate how they are going to survive while waiting for their case to be resolved.
Unfortunately, it’s not an easy situation. Usually there is no magical fund or nest egg or any extra government program that will provide you the resources to pay your bills or keep the lights on while you wait.
Here are some tips that you may want to think about (Even if you don’t want to explore them):
1) 3Fs, part 1 & 2!! Family and Friends! Almost any form of charity starts with your personal resources. Most people are proud and don’t want to feel like they are looking for a hand out. However, in this economy, if you are in a position where you are waiting for your case to be resolved, I would advise you to look seriously at your family and friends for help during these times.
2) 3Fs, part 3! Faith! You would be surprised by the number of resources your church has. Most people don’t realize that the church is usually the focal point for a variety of different charities which may be able to help you.
3) Social Services. Almost every city, county or state has some form of social services which can assist you with your situation. The best part is that Social Services is a gateway to a variety of other services that may be available to you.
4) Community services. Don’t sleep on the non profit organizations. In this time of need, they are a crucial point of support and guidance. These organizations typically have connections to both private and government entities which may help you.
It is really tough to have to deal with these situations but it is tougher when you don’t have money in a banking account that can help you. Don’t be afraid to reach out to these resources. They can help you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Tips for dealing with agencies
I know you don’t want to hear this but it really pays to be nice. It’s funny because so many times when people hire an attorney, they expect to have someone who is going to be jumping up and down on a table and screaming about “YOU better help my client OR ELSE!”.
Well, let me be the first to tell you that I am the complete opposite. I still believe in the old adage “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar”.
I know this sounds really corny but you gotta appreciate why I say these words. It’s really beneficially that you are nice when dealing with these individuals. However, it doesn’t stop there. I’m not saying you need to be nice 24/7 but here are few thoughts to keep in mind:
1) If everyone else is ‘cussing them out’, why would you join in on the ‘cussing’? I have dealt with so many different agencies that deal with the public and have to listen to being told off, cussed out, threatened, or even, humiliated by someone. You can’t be surprised when you run across an Agency employee who seems to not really care. It’s not that they don’t care, but sometimes when you NEED something, you don’t think about the person you’re asking. You are so business wanting to ‘put them in their place’ and ‘make them recognize’ that they better get right, you don’t stop for ONE second to think about them. Put it like this, if someone cussed you out for something that you are, in good faith, trying to do, what you do??
2) Threatening almost NEVER works! Be mindful of who you are talking to when you are dealing with agencies. If you are dealing with the federal government and you THREATEN to go to your governor, do you REALLY expect that agency person to be moved? And please, get it out of your mind that just because you KNOW someone, you think this is going to be a powerful bargaining chip. You have to understand that by ‘threatening someone’, you put yourself in adversarial position. If someone threatened you, would you REALLY go out of your way to help?
3) I’m sure their phone isn’t broke. Why are you calling 2 to 3 times a day??? And don’t give me that crap about “I’m making sure they got the message”. I understand if you call twice in one day and then wait a few days and then call back. However, if you are calling 2 to 3 times a day and leaving a message, the person is reviewing your message 2 to 3 times a day. Do you really think that they are going to rush to deal with you??
4) There is a way to use the system. Stop grumbling and just deal with the system. Pay attention to where you went. Pay attention to when you went. If the person is not helping you or being rude or belligerent, ask to speak to a supervisor. If you don’t get any recourse, then contact your government representative or get a lawyer. Why waste time trying to MAKE someone do something? Just take advantage of the resources available to you.
5) Remember who you talked to and when and their number. I know you don’t believe this but you really should make a practice of paying attention to who you spoke to and remember their number. Don’t think I don’t do it. I deal with Social Security Administration every day and I know who I can call in certain offices who will be nice to me. No shame in my game.
6) Put it in writing. The easiest way to demonstrate to commitment is to put it in writing. Document when you called. Document when you stopped by. Document who you spoke with or dealt with and document what they did. Trust me. No matter how good your memory may be, you can’t remember everything.
7) You would be surprised by the number of things you can get by being nice or polite. Yes, yes, I know this is corny. When people call me from agencies, when I am asking how I am doing, I always say “I’m just PEACHY KEEN!”. Now, you may think that’s corny. However, you would be surprised at how “disarming” that statement and how much it makes people laugh. When you are dealing with people on a regular basis who are cussing you out and telling you off, you like to deal with someone who will make you smile.
People remember the people who stand out. GOOD or BAD! At the end of the day, people are PEOPLE! They remember the people who are helpful. They remember the people who are polite. They remember the people who are pleasant. They, also, remember the people who are rude. They remember the people who are STANK! They remember the people who unbearable.
Listen, I’m never going to tell you that you need “suck up” or “belittle yourself” in order to get something but you have to reverse the roles for a second. A lot of the people in these agencies are doing the work of 2 people in order to service twice as many people that they can handle. They understand your plight and they genuinely want to help. However, they are still PEOPLE and I’ll be the first to tell you. I don’t respond to any “Showing Out” and I’m sure you don’t either. So why would you expect someone who works for an agency to respond??
-
Brought to you by:
